A mother is the fiercest protector

I saw a mother hold her son's hand so very very tight as she maneuvered through the mass of cars in the after school parking lot. She griped it tightly and told him to stay close. She protected him like they were walking in a mine field. I thought back to those days when I too would grab those little hands even when no car was in sight just to make sure they were safe. I was a fierce protector of my children. I remember when they were little and we went to the rodeo at the Fair Grounds. They were pre teen boys who were too embarrassed to go in the women's with me and wanted to go into the men's. I let loose of those little pudgy hands and held their faces up to mine telling them with eyes pleading for them to listen, "Go straight to a stall, lock the door, do not make eye contact with anyone and if anyone speaks to you scream, scream loud." They promised over and over and with unwilling hearts as I let them walk through the door of the men's restroom which was filled with wanna be cowboys. With one foot in the door and asking loudly if they were ok, as each man entered I stared in their eyes and memorized their faces, letting them know I was Momma and I would be watching them. Soon my little ones came out with hands still dripping from washing. I hugged them as if they had been gone days and questioned them about their safety. As I looked them over from top to bottom and again stared down the men who came out I thanked God for keeping them safe and we returned to our rodeo seats. Those days are long gone where I can stand half in half out of the men's bathroom or walk them to school each day. I was reminded of this yesterday when my middle son called to tell me he was going to bed at 9pm because he didn't feel good. He began to tell me he was running 101 fever as I grabbed my coat and purse while pulling on my shoes telling Bart I would be back sometime I was driving to Nashville because my baby boy was sick when Zach reminded me he was adult and could take care of himself. An adult, could take care of himself? Oh dear boy, dear boy you may be 23 and you may have scarcely placed stubble on your face, you may be in grad school and have traveled and lived far away but dear boy, never ever will you be an adult and not need your mother. You are my cub and I am your fiercest protector. I will always be your momma who lies awake at night wondering if you have enough covers while you are sleeping in Nashville, and did you remember to take your vitamins and has anyone been mean to you today, and is there any food in your frig. I will travel in my mind when you are driving home every step of the way. I will fight all your battles in my sleep and you will win. And when you come back home to visit I will open the door ever so slightly just to hear you breathing. I will always be your Momma Bear. So as I put my coat away and sat down in the chair I bravely told him take a Tylenol and call me in the morning and let me know how he was feeling. I sat there as he hung up and prayed a short prayer knowing full well I would sit up all night waiting in case he called. So sweet boy you may be grown and you hands bigger but I still want to hold tight to those little pudgy hands and keep you close. I cheer on the momma in the parking lot and tell her keep him safe. And hope someday my little boys will reach out and hold my hand to steady me and keep me safe.