Another momma

Last week I sat at the feet of another momma. Another momma whose world had stop spinning, her heart crushed, her brain unaccepting of what had just happened. I sat at her feet and promised her she would survive, she would keep going, she would continue living. How do I know that? Becasue just 12 years ago I sat in her chair. I too wanted to die. Why should I keep breathing when my child was dead. Why should I want to continue on in this cruel world. Why? I told her what my husband said to me when I uttered the words, please just let me die. He said NO, you have other children who need you and I need you. You can not quit living or breathing because we need you. I told this sweet momma the same thing. I think back to that moment. We were walking out of the hospital, numbed by the pain but all I could think of was not wanting to continue breathing. I did not believe that I would survive, keep going or continue living. But just as I promised this sweet momma, she was not alone, I would travel this journey with her, others would hold her up when she could not continue on. But most of all I promised her God knew our pain. He watched His son die on the cross. He knew our pain. And while we have to endure the sleepless nights, the questioning the not wanting to live, God would see us through. So what kept me going? Bart telling me I had to live for my other children, the people praying, the friends surrounding me but most of all, God. I could cry out to Him and pound on His shoulders and He would just hold me. Hold me in His loving arms, weeping with me. He would surround me with unexplained peace at times when it made no sense. So sweet momma, as I watched you sit in front of your child's casket, I pray for you. I pray that God will surround you and your family with a peace that is unexplainable. I pray that as people begin to go back to their lives, that God will put others in your path to help you through this time. That a card, a flower, a text or phone call when happen when you need it most. That you will not feel as if you are on this journey alone. There are far too many of us mommas out here who know your pain. We pray for you and hold to the faith that we will see our children again. That some day we will hold them in our arms and our sorrow will be erased. For now, they just have a different address, Heaven. We will see them again and oh what a glorious day that will be. But until then, we keep on surviving, breathing and living. God will see us through. Stop for a moment today and lift the sweet mommas whose children have died way too soon up in prayer. Call and let them know you are thinking of them. Tell them a story about their child. Use their name outloud. But most of all pray for peace.