Sometimes a funeral can be inspiring.

I went to a funeral today. I didn't know the lady but she was the sister of my Aunt June so I went because of her. When you don't personally know the person you can really take in what they are saying. I know this because I have been to a funeral where I knew no one, but that is another story. But at today's funeral I didn't know the person being buried, Gladys. She would have been 90 years young this Fall. She was very sickly towards the end and Hospice had helped the family with the process of dying. And it is a process. Some people approach with fear, some with anxiety, some with welcome relief. Gladys I think from what I heard today approached it with some sadness because she would no longer be with her family. But I know she also approached it with open arms because she would be with her Lord.
But as I sat there and listened to the family and pastor speak about this wonderful woman I thought wow, I wish I had know her. She sounded like a really amazing person. She had traveled far and wide, she had raised her family then began a career, she was an avid reader and she loved her family deeply. She was my kind of person.
The family spoke of her smile. That no matter how she felt she said with a smile on her face she was fine. Throughout even the last days when she was in pain, couldn't walk, couldn't hear much and couldn't see much she still had such a positive attitude.
They told of how she never had a bad word to say about anyone. Anyone. Wow. She welcomed everyone as family even if they weren't. Part of her family lived overseas and when they would come home for 6 weeks she would let them take over her house, her car even her bed. She was flexible beyond words. She just enjoyed the fact they were there.
When she went overseas to visit it wasn't about show me a good time. She wanted to just enjoy being with them and living their everyday life.
She was never too busy to read to a child, or talk to a friend.
I began to wonder what would my kids have to say at my funeral. Would they say I had a positive attitude or negative one? Would they say they had never heard me speak a bad word about anyone? Would they say I enjoyed people just being there or was I more concerned about my house? Would they say I sat down and read a book or watched a movie with them or was I too busy cooking or cleaning? Would they say I was flexible or was I rigid? At this point I am glad it isn't my funeral because I am afraid the answer to most of those questions would not be yes. Instead, it would be I was a busy body who was negative and sometimes an angry person. That I cared more that my house was clean than about the people in it. I am afraid they would say I was often too busy for them. I can not change the past but I can change the future.
I want my words to be soft and positive. I have always wanted to be demure but I know that will never happen. I want to be flexible and enjoy the moment no matter how messy it may be. I want to sit and look them in the eyes and listen, really listen, to what they think and feel. I want to hug them often and kiss them right on the lips no matter how embarrassed they get. I want to be remembered as a Godly woman who loved her family and friends unconditionally.
I don't think it is morbid to think of these things. I think we all need a reality check every now and then. We get this one life to accomplish it all here on Earth. And our actions will speak volumes about who we truly were. I hope today, Gladys, you know you are helping to make me a better person. When I think about ironing instead of listening I will think of you.
When I think of speaking about someone I will remember your childrens' words. When I want to complain about how I feel I will put a smile on. So, thank you Gladys Petty for a life well lived and a legacy passed on. Sometimes it helps to go to a funeral and just remember how precious life is.